Kids say the funniest things!

We love reading the cute little anecdotes sent in by parents for our Tickle section in Tots to Teens Magazine each issue. Here are a few samples to tickle your funny bone.

Telling Tales

We were travelling in the family van. My 3-year old daughter was watching her 13-year old brother reading beside her. ”What are you doing?” she asked him. ”Reading” was the obvious answer. “Mum, he’s lying to me!” she shouted. ”I am not!” retorted my indignant son. “He said he’s reading, but NO words are coming out of his mouth!” she shouted. I had to quickly explain the concept of silent reading to my offended 3-year-old.

Didn’t you know?

My 4-year old granddaughter was singing “The wheels on the bus” song, but was having trouble with the words. She sang “The wipers on the bus go swish, swish swish” then continued with, “The wipers on the trees go swish, swish, swish”. I told her that there are no wipers on trees. She thought for a minute, then said quietly, “There ARE wipers on trees, but they’re REALLY small”.

Veggie Brain

I asked my 4-year old son what he had learned in school that day and he said they had learned that potatoes come from the sky and can wreck houses. I was a little concerned that maybe we were wasting our hard-earned money on this private school, so I asked him some questions. He explained that they can also lift cars and people off the ground. Finally I understood. “You mean, tornados, sweetheart”, I said, emphasising the ’T’. He looked at me and said. “That’s right, tormatoes”.

Ten-second rule

My 6-year old had a packet of wine gums and was eating them one by one. His 3-year old sister asked, “Can I have one?”. Very reluctantly, big brother said OK to his eagerly awaiting sister, but as he hands it over, it drops to the ground! His little sister’s face drops, too. “Don’t worry”, says big bro “Remember the 10-second rule – count to 10 and then pick it up”. They both stand over it, counting to 10, before a delighted little sister picks it up and pops it in her mouth.

Gourmet chef

My 5-year old son told me he really liked the garlic bread that we had with dinner the night before. “Your dad made that, isn’t he a good cook,” I said to my son. He replied. “Yeah he is a good cook, maybe he should work at Domino’s”

Understated

My 6-year old daughter was practising her line as the ‘bad fairy’ in Sleeping Beauty at breakfast recently. “And why didn’t anyone invite ME? Sleeping Beauty will prick her finger on a spindle and DIE!” she dramatically shouted as she waved her pretend wand. Wanting to contribute, her 3-year old sister added, through a mouth full of Weetbix, “Yeah, get a big ouchy”.

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